Holidays, New Show, Emotional Rollercoaster
Hi there again in blogger land!
Just been reflecting on the emotional rollercoaster I feel like I have been on the past few days...weeks?...months?...
Wish that these pangs of inadequacy would just find some other body with which to occupy its time. Most times I feel very grateful for my passions, drives and yes, talents. But every so often, those little voices creep into my consciousness and want to erase all the wonderful esteem I have mustered over these past few years.
I guess none of us are immuned to this human flaw. I must say it is nice to be able to recognize it and challenge its validity.
Last night I went to the Purple Onion for our show "finale" practice and then for the usual open mic at the Purple Onion. After trying out a few new pieces I plan to do at the showcase on the 20th and got some feedback,although most of the feedback was good, I let the one critical piece of feedback overshadow all else. It was from a fellow singer that, although a good singer, I have a problem with the authenticity of this person's performance when I see it. And for me, authenticity is all important. It's what I strive for in my performance.
So I guess I could (should) discount this critique or I could try to derive from it what I can to improve my performance or I could let it affect my self esteem.
Guess which one I chose.
Then I went to my acting class tonight and, although I was a bit late due to recording music for my show to use to rehearse, I thoroughly enjoyed viewing and working in this environment. I always do. It is like a safe playground where I get to explore and exercise all of those emotions that truly make up me...but are not always often seen. And it almost always leaves me feeling accomplished and utilizing my talents and gifts in a unique way, a way that only I can bring to the work.
In general, I love to watch others work, be it on a cabaret stage or in an acting environment. I gain so much from observing others...and performing and stretching myself in the process.
It is so easy to focus on the "bad" stuff rather than all the "good" stuff going on or being said or feeling about oneself. Really in the end, it is what you focus on that gets magnified and replicated. So, hell, why not choose the "good" stuff.
That's what I keep reminding myself of...focus on the "good" stuff. Everything else is just wasted energy and counterproductive.
Ciao for now,
Rick
Just been reflecting on the emotional rollercoaster I feel like I have been on the past few days...weeks?...months?...
Wish that these pangs of inadequacy would just find some other body with which to occupy its time. Most times I feel very grateful for my passions, drives and yes, talents. But every so often, those little voices creep into my consciousness and want to erase all the wonderful esteem I have mustered over these past few years.
I guess none of us are immuned to this human flaw. I must say it is nice to be able to recognize it and challenge its validity.
Last night I went to the Purple Onion for our show "finale" practice and then for the usual open mic at the Purple Onion. After trying out a few new pieces I plan to do at the showcase on the 20th and got some feedback,although most of the feedback was good, I let the one critical piece of feedback overshadow all else. It was from a fellow singer that, although a good singer, I have a problem with the authenticity of this person's performance when I see it. And for me, authenticity is all important. It's what I strive for in my performance.
So I guess I could (should) discount this critique or I could try to derive from it what I can to improve my performance or I could let it affect my self esteem.
Guess which one I chose.
Then I went to my acting class tonight and, although I was a bit late due to recording music for my show to use to rehearse, I thoroughly enjoyed viewing and working in this environment. I always do. It is like a safe playground where I get to explore and exercise all of those emotions that truly make up me...but are not always often seen. And it almost always leaves me feeling accomplished and utilizing my talents and gifts in a unique way, a way that only I can bring to the work.
In general, I love to watch others work, be it on a cabaret stage or in an acting environment. I gain so much from observing others...and performing and stretching myself in the process.
It is so easy to focus on the "bad" stuff rather than all the "good" stuff going on or being said or feeling about oneself. Really in the end, it is what you focus on that gets magnified and replicated. So, hell, why not choose the "good" stuff.
That's what I keep reminding myself of...focus on the "good" stuff. Everything else is just wasted energy and counterproductive.
Ciao for now,
Rick
posted by Rick at 1:13 AM
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